Tuesday, September 27, 2005

Filmmaking

It's been a long time since I have not made a new film. I have done some small things here and there but not a real film. Mostly because I was so busy moving to Canada and making my living in here. I was also not quite sure if I really wanted to accept all the hassels and joys of filmmaking or I wanted to be a good girl and have a normal life like everyone else.

Today I finally came to the conclusion that filmmaking is my way of life. I really love doing it no matter how hard it is. Even if I don't get to actually make them, just being in the process of picking an idea, developing it, and trying to make it interesting for potential funders/audience is an amazing process that I really enjoy doing it. So, why not?

This is a moment of getting focused on what I really want. From now on, it doesn't matter if I actually get to make any movie (documentary in the case of Canada). The significant thing is that I will be trying to do it.

Saturday, September 24, 2005

آن بالا در آسمان
و از میان پنجره کوچک
زمین را می دیدم
که زیر پایم سر می خورد
و خاطرات تلخ و خوش مرا با خود می برد
آن لحظه دانستم
که تنها شدم

دیگر خانه نیست
دیگر بوی خوش آشپزخانه
و آغوش مهربان مادر
و طنین صدای پدر نیست
و دوست رفته است

باید خودم باشم
تنهای تنها
در خلوتی که در آن
هیچ صدایی به گوش نمی رسد

و "دیگران"
در روز "حادثه"
صدای تنهایی های قلب مرا نخواهند شنید.

***

یک روز
در سکوت خود
و در تلاطم صداها و رنگ ها
چشمان آشنایی را دیدم
که به من نگاه می کردند
و فکر کردم
که این لحظه زیبا
فردا به خاطره ای بدل خواهد شد

چشمان مشتاق
میهمان عزیز
- و همیشگی -
قلب من شدند

دل من بی امان تنهایی
و او در شوق کشف آن
- زمین بکر،
ناشناخته -

من را از او گریز
و او را از من رهایی نیست

قلمرو تنهایی
به پیوندی نویافته
تسلیم شد

heroin addicts

These days I am hearing a lot of horrible news regarding abusing drugs among Iranian youth. I know that some young people tend to abuse drugs everywhere in the world including West... marijuana, grass, weed is kind of common here... ok...but what about heroin?... it is a true danger for life. It is not something that people can get involved so easily in here. And yes, many Iranians, rich and poor, girls and boys are addicted to heroin...

So, where this sense of self-destruction is coming from? Why Iranian youth is so submissive and passive? Why instead of dealing with their problems, they are taking drugs? Why are they so willing to lose their lives? Why life is so cheap over there? Every one blames the system. ok... but system is made of all of us, isn't it? And moreover, taking drugs is a personal choice.

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

busy busy busy

I have got a new project which is not owned by "capitalists" but it is even against them! It is a documentary that happens in Chilie. A war between an aboriginal tribe and the land owners. Sounds that I have to get up early to edit that and then go to work to edit the rest of the stuff! No more time for myself, no more time for updating my blog!